Oana
Hello. Welcome to episode 29 of the Feminine Uncut podcast, and we’re going to go mystical today, so bear with us a little bit or even just say cheers. We’ve been waiting for mystical all around. Stay with us and we’ll explore more. But if you’re here for the first time, let’s unmystify what we’re doing. I’m Oana your host, a life coach, and founder of The Feminine.com, a digital platform dedicated to women all over the world. And we here champion a new paradigm, a spiritual paradigm of taking care of ourselves as women, the Feminine Way, which means being guided by the feminine energy and the feminine principle, which only benefits our self-love, our self-care, our self-worth, and our capacity to be a leader in the world and share our amazing visionary stories with the world. Curious to explore more? Start your Feminine journey by accessingthefeminine.com SACREDSPACE and begin your feminine initiation. The Sacred Space of the Heart, which is a meditation I created, is a bedrock of anything you desire on the Feminine path and also supports you and starts the journey of manifesting life, in the Feminine Way. And it’s something you can do daily.
Oana
You just tune in and you get that feminine support that we all need and deserve. And if you want to learn more about my method, about the Feminine way and how it all came to be, tune into episodes 26 and 27 and you’ll get the picture of how I started, why I’m such a true believer in this work and in the power of the feminine energy, what are its benefits and how you can integrate that lifestyle into your life? And today we’re going to really tackle a very important subject, which is Sisterhood and the Sacred Circle, and really come to grips and understand why is that relevant to our Feminine Journey? In the previous episode, we talked about the challenges of meeting the feminine energy and the first steps of activating the feminine energy in our lives. And now we’re actually looking at what supports you on the Feminine Journey, and what, if activated strongly enough, can give you the anchors and the strength and the power to carry through in the process of defining yourself femininely and really abiding the feminine principles and values. And I’m here with Ioana, and we’re really loving this podcast, and she’s going to throw questions and we’re going to share and make it as earthly and relatable as possible. Hi, Ioana.
Ioana
Hi, Oana. Why is Sisterhood different from friendship?
Oana
Because it’s not about liking each other sacred. Sisterhood, not just Sisterhood, is about committing to one another from a place of I have your back. I’m not here to be your friend. I’m not here to judge you. I’m not here to make you comfortable. I’m not here to betray you. I’m not here to leave you or stand by you. I’m here to honor your family journey and who you are as a woman and I’m here in a way to a higher octave, a higher vibration because it’s not necessarily so personal. Like, I’m sisters with women who I’m not friends with. I’m a sister to any woman who wants to live in the truth of who she is. And that can be my mother, it can be my sister, it can be my best friend, it can be acquaintances, it can be foreigners and strangers. It can be any woman across the globe in either lifetimes, past lifetimes, or the future. It’s about connecting with the sacredness of the feminine energy and those women who are willing to take that journey.
Ioana
That’s exactly why I started so with such a straight question. Because putting an equal between sisterhood and friendship is like canceling the whole depth and the whole value of sisterhood. And why we do it from my perspective and from my experience, is because we don’t have a frame of reference for that kind of support and that kind of sacredness in our lives. We are completely oblivious to how this kind of super special and high vibrational connection can happen and can support our journeys. And my second question is how can we learn to be sisters if nobody taught us?
Oana
Yeah, that’s a very important question. Well, you understand that what unites you is your access to the feminine energy. And in our membership program, we have a sacred circle, and we’re sisters. And I always teach women there who are the graduates because you enter the membership once you take any program of ours because you need to kind of like, get the initiation into the activation and the activation of the feminine energy to really start the conversation. So just saying yes to that puts you in the membership circle. And I also tell women there it’s not so much liking each other, loving each other, and hugging each other, as it is our deep connection with our inner self and our feminine energy deep inside. Once I tune into my feminine energy and I’m allowing myself through the space of my heart, through the warmth, through the intuition, through the Earth energy, to connect with the divine feminine, and I let the divine feminine guide me. I’m more of a sister to any woman aware of her family gifts or not, than just hugging and loving and declaring my love to other women on Instagram, on Instagram, or whatever.
Oana
It doesn’t mean that I don’t have women in my life that I love, that I champion. But I’m actually more of a channel for the right type of feminine energy when I go deeper into my feminine practice. And the light energy, the high-end vibration of the feminine energy that comes through my practice when I cultivate the feminine energy, heals the feminine psyche, the collective feminine psyche. So I’m making a difference on a collective level. I’m giving water to all the thirsty women out there who are clinging and longing and wanting the feminine. And that’s a very important thing. And the access point to that is living sacredly and living by ritual. Sacredness cannot be anchored just like that. It needs a ritual, it needs a practice. It needs a committed time and space for you to listen and feel and talk sacredly. So the secret codes of the sisterhood are my capacity to listen sacredly to your journey, without judging you, without giving you advice, without hammering things on you, without healing you, without fixing you. Just like being the witness of your magnitude, even if you’re at your lowest and really trusting you, me, the feminine working its interesting magic into your lives, my lives, and the lives of women.
Ioana
So to be able to access the sacred sisterhood, the first thing we have to do is consciously put ourselves in service of something higher than ourselves and stop clinging to the meat. All about me conversation that is so present.
Oana
Yes. And it’s very funny. I have two things I want really want to say. So I just want to pop up and say that at some point. One is about my example of sisterhood and the power of sisterhood. And the other one was when I was coming here for the podcast. I was watching Oprah talk to Trevor Noah about how she demystified Michael’s Jackson sexual abuse and how she talked about Neverland and the reason why she did it. And she said that she did 270 episodes about sexual abuse and the pattern of seduction, which goes around sexual abuse cases. And she really felt that 270 didn’t really create any impact in society around the seduction and the sexual abuse that is happening at the collective psychic level. And that she felt that even if she takes the hate of the whole world against her right, she felt that she needed to step up and take that hate and take that blame and really put this out there in the world to demystify and come and bring to awareness on a social level the seduction pattern of the sexual abuse that is collectively there. And it’s not about the 270 cases of sexual abuse that she brought to light.
Oana
It’s not about her sexual abuse. It’s about the collective pattern. So in modulating opera as a very powerful reference point for all of us, sisterhood is about the collective pattern. So you’re like taking your little story and you are putting yourself higher than your little story and you are supporting the collective pattern of womanhood through the sisterhood. And it may come from particular women that you have, like a sacred circle, a little circle they have around your home, or it may just come from your feminine energy or the feminine energy of other lifetimes. I was so amazed by one of my assistants back in the early days of my work because she had to go through an abortion. It wasn’t expected. She couldn’t really deal with that pregnancy. And she decided to make an abortion. And I totally supported her choice. And I was there with her all the way, but she was young and she was afraid. And she went into this procedure and she told me I was so afraid. I started praying and I started bringing the feminine energy into my heart and praying to it. And I just want to tell you that this amazing experience happened to me.
Oana
I was praying, and then I was like hypnotically taken into something, into an experience where I really felt the love and the light energy of all the women who have gone through abortions supporting me going through this procedure that I was very afraid of. And I released the shame, the blame, the guilt, and just moved to it and healed physically from the procedure amazingly fast, just working with that love energy that was the support of the feminine energy and of the women who have gone through this and have forgiven themselves for that act. So this is using the sisterhood in your life and connecting to the sacred circle. It’s beyond the women in your life. It’s extra power. It’s a superpower that you have access to, and you can also contribute to it through your feminine practice every day.
Ioana
Now I was thinking this is the beginning. That’s going to be a mystical episode. And here’s a mystical question. Can the sacred circle of Sister connect us with women who lived many hundreds of years before us?
Oana
Yes. And it can also connect us with light beings that are feminine energy in their essence and bring those resources to us because when we work with archetypal imagery and patterns, we work also with the feminine guide. Most of my journey wasn’t about the feminine, wasn’t reading books, wasn’t living with other women. It was really a mystical, meditative experience, a transmission from women who are Masters that were spiritual and they were devoting their lives to the feminine energy, like Juanita like green, Tara like Kali, and Durga, like Virgin Mary, like women who have abided by the feminine values, really put it to the test. Red devoted their life to those values and managed to create a spiritual journey out of them. So when we work with compassion, we basically don’t have so much reference in our day-to-day life about it. We need to go very spiritual to bring that type of potent Alexa to our hearts and really heal wounds and traumas and pain. So we work with Quantine, for example, which is an ascended master who has really embedded compassion and has been enlightened in the Buddhist tradition through compassion.
Ioana
And this is a beautiful paradigm because even if the journey is a journey you make by yourself in solitude, it suddenly shifts something so you don’t feel lonely anymore. This is one of those things that I experienced. And another question, which is more Monday, and it’s not that original.
Oana
Take a pause. You don’t feel lonely anymore. What’s that? That’s the crisis of any single decent human being and woman on the face of the planet. What? You don’t feel lonely and Prince Charmin didn’t come. Oh my God. But he’s used to the world. But the sisterhood is healing loneliness, which is actually true. I just made the joke because you just said it and you said it like it’s nothing important or it’s something regular. But if I look at the 1000 women that I’ve worked with, literally worked with in my workshops, loneliness has been the thing that drove everybody crazy, including me, as a facilitator. Because it was the only thing, the only reason, the biggest step in our lives, why we do not do things great and big, because we’re lonely and we don’t have a man to support us, why we don’t divorce, because we can’t really cope on ourselves and we’ll just die of loneliness. Loneliness is that big excuse we use. And feeling lonely comes from two things. It comes from your wounded child in her child. And it comes from as a woman not connected to the sacred circle of the feminine energy. It doesn’t come from the embodiment of a man physically in your life, while we definitely appreciate their support and their presence in our lives.
Ioana
But you know what’s funny? I’m laughing now because particularly yesterday I had a conversation with somebody who is insisting on telling me how shocked he is, I was lonely and I’m not willing to engage in a relationship just for the sake of doing that. And I’m trying to keep my call. No, I’m really keeping my calm. It’s like I’m really passive to the conversation and I’m just trying to remember if was I really keen on that two years ago.
Oana
Let me tell you, it was the only thing you were working on.
Ioana
I don’t know when.
Oana
But it shifted just like that. But literally understanding that the love we hunger for doesn’t come only from the man. We need multiple facets of that love experience.
Ioana
It has nothing to do with it.
Oana
Well, it has something to do with it. The romance, the sexuality.
Ioana
No, I’m saying it has nothing to do. The feeling lonely part. You can feel lonely when you are in a relationship. In a relationship, yes. Okay, I’m going to go back to what I want to ask because it actually connects a bit. I notice. And this is something I’m really not I want to say I understand, but I don’t know what other words to use. I can’t explain it why many women who were present in my life before my process started are not present anymore. Women. Shouldn’t the connection create bonds?
Oana
But other women have come into your life?
Ioana
Yeah, of course, other women have come into my life. But why the old friends fled?
Oana
I don’t think it was only women. I think it was men and women as well if you’re really transparent about it. But while you’re addressing women I don’t think it’s about women. I think it’s about vibration. Because the moment you choose to live more sacredly, more aligned with who you are, you are also aligning with people who are willing to be more aligned with who they are. So the people who are not ready yet are not going to engage in that shift. So it’s not like we’re leaving them behind or they’re abandoning us. It’s really more we’re disconnecting from that paradigm, moving into a different paradigm, having a different quality of life, and then the same things that felt pleasurable. We’re not feeling pleasure from them anymore. It’s a shift. And I think if you go back with honesty to those connections now, you could see that those conversations that they’re in just don’t serve you anymore. They don’t inspire anymore. You don’t feel attached to them anymore because you have outgrown your old version of yourself.
Ioana
It’s even more than that. And I didn’t ask the question randomly because what I wanted to highlight is that saying yes to the sacredness and to sisterhood brings light to your truth. And you cannot live in lying. You cannot live lying anymore. And every relationship and all the dynamics that were built on something that was not true or on lies disappear. For me, it was the most important benefit of accessing this kind of vibration starting to live in my truth.
Oana
Yes. That’s part of the semi-insurance.
Ioana
And it can be also challenging, speaking about the challenges we demystify in the previous podcast. Sure. Is it something that it’s easy to say yes to being in your truth, everything? Yeah. Being in your truth, saying yes to your sister, who is being ready to give up on what is convenient for the sake of hard or challenging.
Oana
I think it’s more connected to what you want because sisterhood really brings love as an experience into your life. I see a lot of people who crave love, but they’re not really ready to receive it.
Ioana
Yes, I hear you.
Oana
Yes. And receiving it doesn’t mean when we say that we think all Prince Charming is coming. Oh, I’m not actually saying he may come and he may be the channel through which you experience love. But I’m talking about stopping caressing yourself and let go and rest. Do something pleasurable, stop being in the mind and indulge in your senses and really live ecstatically, like love and pleasure in your every day to day life. Like your body is immense in pleasure, like your body is filled with love. We get so scared because most of us don’t really understand love, don’t really understand pleasure, or don’t really feel it or experience it. So we don’t trust it. And this lack of trust is keeping it away. Now, when you say yes to sister, you have 10,000 arms around you, holding you in Grace and in love, giving you access to breathe with your own heart, to move through the fear of receiving love, and just move through the fear until your heart cracks open and you’re allowing that shower of energy of love and care to inundate you so that you start feeling of an experience love, maybe for the first time in your life, and then learn how to channel it and nurture it and attract things and people and situations in your life that are a function of love or that are based on the same value called love, shared love.
Oana
So it’s like sisterhood supports whatever you have in your journey that you need to heal. You need to activate, you need to own it, that network of light that keeps you up when you’re down and celebrates with you when you definitely want to shout through the roof that you’re great because everything that’s taboo, we need support with even celebration, we don’t celebrate. I’ve recently had a breakthrough in my personal life with my partner where he actually is a beginner on the journey and he is acclimating himself to the experience of celebration and love. And he generated he manifested a huge result for him. Like a huge result for him. He couldn’t even say, hey, he was so suppressed in his celebration, in the acknowledgment of that result. And it was like I wanted to shake him up and shout at him as like being happy. No, I was angry. I was like, you motherfucker, you are suppressing my right to celebrate. I supported you have this result. I want to scream from the roof that I’m so freaking happy that we did this and it was such a result. And he stole my joy because he couldn’t receive that level of acknowledgment and celebration and love. And of course, I was wisely, compassionately, supporting him on his journey to say yes to joy. But I felt robbed of my moment of joy. And then I have the sisterhood and I can go and I can dance like a wild woman and I can shout at the moon celebrating my joy for my result. It was my result also supporting him having that result. And it was like, thank God I released that joy. Otherwise, it got me blocked. Because if I don’t release that joy, I don’t acknowledge and own the level I’ve grown into and then I can’t open up to the new level, the next level. So joy is as important sinus. And we don’t have support for that as well.
Ioana
Definitely. And you’re considered to be a freak if you’re happy. But I really think we’re reaching the end of how much we can explain in words what sisterhood is. So if you are simply curious or want to experience it on your own, you can buy any of our products and you can start at the sacred space and you’ll get access to the sacred circle.
Oana
Yeah. And I said I want to share two things. So I’m just going to interrupt you for a while and share this last thing that I think is very important because most of the women ask me, okay, I need to heal my relationship with women, and the sisterhood can bring that level of healing and that bond to the feminine energy and to women and reclaim my relationship to women. And I really think that that’s key and core because I also had that need in my life, and that’s one of the things that really healed for me in my family journey is my relationship with women, with my mother, with women in general, but also along the journey of sisterhood. Some women asked me, what do I do with women that really treat me badly? It’s a good question because I’m sacred to living life through the feminine. And we have these women that are either cheating with my husband or betraying me or stabbing me in the back and all these things being abusive in one way or another. So what do I do? Because now I pledged my life to the feminine, and that’s also honoring women and living in my truth. And this is the function of sisterhood as a spiritual tool, which means bringing that adversity to a higher octave and bringing gratitude and compassion and healing and forgiveness, and self-forgiveness to the situation. And I had that experience with a woman that I was totally triggered by, and she was totally disrespectful and abusive. I was in a relationship, actually, at the beginning stages of my creating the community and creating the sacred circle and the sisterhood and really being measured in the feminine energy. So I was challenged in the right stage of my development with the feminine, and I was in a relationship with somebody. And in that relationship, the man was still codependent and clinging to his first love, to his past, romantic past. And although they literally probably had nothing physical anymore, they didn’t have sex anymore or something. There was a strong bond between the two of them. And then he met me, which was a challenge in itself. And he didn’t feel that I was the right one for him because he still believes in Cinderella syndrome. But it was like a karmic thing for him and for me, too. It felt like we can’t be apart. So it was this very challenging relationship where we were together, but we weren’t together. It was the ups and downs, the corals and the high passion, and so on and so forth. And funny enough, I really took this relationship to my practice, and I really used the feminine energy to guide myself through the whole process of this relationship. I wanted to put my life to the test and the feminine to the test. And this woman, who, of course, he tolerated and he supported somehow emotionally, totally abusively, came between the two of us ongoingly. So he would lie to me because of her, although the lies were, like playing fully in my face. So it wasn’t such a big lie. In the end, it was obvious he was being with her or meeting her or stuff like that. And it was actually the reason why we ended up because I was so connected to the truth that I was okay with the threesome as long as it was acknowledged. I was like, okay to accommodate because I had that understanding to accommodate his past as long as it was acknowledged. But he couldn’t really step into the truth of it.
Oana
So that was the reason why at the end of the whole relationship, it was a huge journey. It was a long journey. Two years and a half. I said, Well, I actually can’t really leave with somebody who lies. That’s, like, fundamental to who I am. I can accommodate a threesome. I can accommodate a romantic relationship. I can accommodate the fact that we’re not seeing a future together, but we’re having a strong passion. And I can see you for the gift that you bring into my life and for the gift that you are, but I can’t really tolerate you being a liar, and you can’t really be a liar. And this is the reason why we actually have to completely end up our connection. And he was a codependent type of personality, and I ended up cooped together with him and with her. But that was not the problem because I was looking at this codependency, and for the first time in my life, it was the first type of relationship that had the first dynamic like this. I was exploring life, and I really looked at it from a spiritual perspective, and it triggered a lot of things, and I healed a lot of things. And it was a very important, rough relationship, but it was important in my development as a woman and my development as a coach, even. But this woman was very abusive. Like, she would do tantrums. She would really quarrel with me out of no like, she would do stuff that was like, for me. Why would I engage? First of all, I don’t want to switch them publicly. I don’t really want to engage with the two of you at the same time. You can engage separately. So leave me out of this whole mess. And the fact that I’m aware that you have a relationship with her is enough for me. I don’t have to engage. But she was wanting to quarrel, wanting to fight, wanting to bring me into that soup of theirs. And he was coward enough not to set the record straight. So here I was in something that resembled my family dynamic, but that’s another story. But I was challenged about what to do with this woman. She even came to one of my workshops. She really, in the beginning, was very seducing and very friendly and very wanting to have a relationship with me. So I was, like, in this facilitator mode, feeling on one hand as a woman, like, totally, this is danger. And on the other hand, is the facilitator saying, what am I going to say no to this woman who wants to say yes to the family energy? So she came into my workshop. Of course, her agenda was to minimize me, and she couldn’t. And that was a bad fall for the whole game that she was having. But funny enough, and you’re not going to really see this coming, or you might see this at some point, funny enough, she stayed in the whole course, which tells you that it’s not about women as personas. It’s about feminine energy. And although she hated the guts out of me, you could see it in her eyes. She wanted to do something to trash me down, but she couldn’t, because my work ethic is very high, and my work ethic with her was very high, and she couldn’t. Like, she was trying to find a way to stab me in the back or stab me in the front or whatever, but she couldn’t. And even the way I channeled my relationship with both of them was from a place of respect. She really didn’t have energetically anywhere to attack, but she was constantly attacking me through him.
Oana
And I was constantly saying, I need you to him because I wasn’t talking to her. I lost after, you know, that initiation we had together. She did a huge tantrum, and I was like, there are borders to interaction, and this is my border. Healthy boundaries. Sorry. So I wasn’t communicating with her, but she was communicating with me through him. And I was saying, no, healthy boundaries, healthy boundaries. But I was dealing also with him. He’s in the capacity to respect my boundaries, and so on and so forth. And at some point, it really became, like, intense. And I was like, okay, I need to put this to my meditation practice, and I need to put this in my sacred Heart and in my ritual and really ask the divine feminine, what am I going to do with this woman? Because it’s really completed. And the message came very clearly. You’re going to honor the feminine energy that is channeled through her. You’re going to honor the Shakti, and you’re going to honor her codes and her DNA as Shakti. And you’re going to look at whatever doesn’t work in her personality and in her behavior and in her tantrums, and you’re going to say no to that, but you’re going to honor her, and you’re going to say, no.
Oana
You’re going to honor her, and you’re going to say no. And I did that. And that whole conflict disappeared. She was still in his life. Actually, when I broke up with him, I broke up because he was lying to himself, and he was lying to her, to me. Funny enough, we were at some point becoming friends in this context, because she saw that it wasn’t me, it was him. I saw that it wasn’t hurried with him. So when I broke up with him, he actually managed through my love, through my passion for my commitment to that relationship, through all the talks we had, long night talks to understand that that relationship co-dependent relationship from his past is preventing him from moving forward. And that dynamic is always going to trash down his relationships with other women. And he met what he thought was the one in his life. So he decided to also move away from my relationship with him. But we were kind of on the same page at that moment and ended finally after 20 something years, that communication with his former lover and got married and really thought he did a huge breakthrough in his life.
Oana
He didn’t because he was still lying to himself, which one year later proved not to be such a good life choice. Anyway, funny enough, one year later, that woman wrote to me and can you imagine I’m not talking to him anymore because why would I? She’s not talking to him anymore, but we’re talking to each other. And she wrote to me saying she actually misses me and she would love because she heard I’m married and I have a child and she is very happy for me and she’s actually curious about motherhood and how I came to be a mother and my girl and she misses me and she would really love to catch up. And actually, I’m not going to do that. That woman really needs to do her process before I can interact with her because she has issues and I’m done with supporting people who have issues but are in denial of those issues in my personal life. But I told her, you know what’s funny about our interaction right now? And she said, no, what? We’re both not talking to this guy that we share life with commonly we had a common affair with, but we’re talking to each other. Isn’t feminine energy so funny? And she said, yeah, feminine energy beats everything. And it was the sisterhood. It wasn’t friendship. We’re probably still adverse to one another on a personality level if we really put it to the test. But it was the feminine energy. It’s working, it’s magic, and actually healthy for everybody because the guy moved on. I moved on. She definitely moved on. They were stuck in a freaking story that was done years ago and just re-putting it to the test again. So it’s like really powerful. The sisterhood and the feminine energy. So you’re not honoring that behavior. You’re saying no to the behavior that’s dysfunctional. You’re taking a stand for yourself. You’re fighting for your rights. You’re creating healthy boundaries around what works for you. But you’re honoring the feminine energy that’s channeled through every woman and that’s honoring your sisterhood, your connection with the feminine energy, and the feminine energy. And in time, not very fast, not right away, but in time, it all comes to a resolution. So hopefully I’ve ignited some sort of inspiration and passion for you to start not only your feminine journey but live more sacredly in relationship to the feminine energy.
Ioana
You inspired me for sure because I still have some homework to do on that level. So I’m saying yes to that and let’s see what happens. But I will also do the work because saying yesterday is just the beginning of everything.
Oana
Yeah.
Ioana
Because of the story.
Oana
Yeah. Thank you for sharing and thank you for the questions hopefully we’ll hear some of your stories as well. We’re definitely inviting you to bring this to the table. Thank you.
Ioana
Thank you.
