Oana
Hi and welcome back to episode 28 of the Feminine Uncut Podcast. And I can’t really wait for 280. We really love this podcast, and we really created a rhythm and a flow in our team about it and with it, and we hope it will reach many hearts, not only women, men as well, and who knows, even the next generation of children. As promised, today we’re going to tap into the challenges of meeting the feminine energy. It’s how we ended up our last podcast. And I think it’s important to go deeper and really understand. Once you take it, you activate the feminine energy that’s coded in your DNA and you power it to be your guide. What’s the challenge of the process? What are also the benefits? And luckily, we are now blessed to live in a world where we have a constant public debate on hot topics around womanhood, how we’re expected to fit as women in collective standards and stereotypes, and how we’re moving away from that. Even the wage gap, harassment, equal division of childcare, how are represented in the media and in the political arena, and discrimination in the workforce. There are so many areas where we as women are pioneering things, are taking a stand, are going public, and are expressing who we are and our voices.
Oana
And I think society is changing a lot. And the feminine cut on that, the feminine take on that is not dealing with those issues because there are leaders who are doing that, women leaders who are doing that, and men who support that. But it really is looking at what we need most in our personal journey as women to be able to empower ourselves, to sustain our vision, and to bring our leadership to the front and really go all the way through in making our vision stand in society. The way we are experiencing things at the feminine and what we share in the platform is really a spiritual path for women that gives access to women to create a context for themselves in which they learn to take care of themselves to a whole new level, which includes mind, body, motion, soul, and also allows the work with the feminine energy so that we can create and define and learn to manifest not only our vision but our life, which turns into a lifestyle in a way that’s deeply feminine, in a way that is embedded with the values and the principles of the feminine energy.
Oana
This is as critical as achieving all those results in the social arena, because we, as social leaders, as women leaders, need to bring the feminine to society. It’s not only about the results we’re achieving. It’s also how we are going to mold society based on the feminine principles. So we’re taking this cut, and we’re taking this look into the activation of the feminine energy in our lives. Why is that important? And why is that such a support structure for our vision and for our leadership for those who don’t know me yet, I’m Juana. And I’m the host and the coach and the founder of The Feminine.com, which is a digital platform dedicated to women all over the world. And we champion a new paradigm of living life, seeing life, and being women, which is deeply embedded in the feminine principles. It is a spiritual journey. It is of spiritual context, and it sets in an emotional set of practices that deeply support women and their rights. And the online programs we create here at The Feminine are the embodiment of my coaching method and also my extensive experience with hundreds and thousands of women that I’ve led workshops with.
Oana
And it brings a true body of work with intention to meet those needs that we have to step forward and deeper into self love, self respect and selfworth, really understand the power of manifestation and how we as women can manifest things through the feminine energy and how we can really be role models and integrate the feminine principle in our society. And if you’re really curious to start your feminine journey, just head over to The Feminine. Comsacrespace and start your journey to the feminine with our one and only meditation, the sacred space of the heart. It’s a meditation which is actually a bedrock of anything you desire or want to manifest the feminine way. And it’s created specially by me to give you a boost every single day to go deeper into your feminine practice and really start engaging with the feminine principle and turn it into a lifestyle. So let’s see, let’s meet the Feminine energy and see its challenges, but also its benefits. And of course, I have my partner with me, Ioana, here to explore this topic.
Ioana
Hi, Oana. Hi, everyone. I have a very low voice because I was in a very meditative state when you were saying the intro. I was, of course, looking for the best questions, to ignite the conversations. And I was having these two thoughts. First, it was like I was thinking about how I connected with your speech and your coaching method, which is super embedded in the feminine when I first met you and the short answer is, I didn’t understand anything. But I was fascinated. And the second thought I had is what I replied when now people ask me what I do for a living. And I say briefly, well, sort of coaching for women. And it’s like, what is that? They don’t understand, but they are again, fascinated. It’s the same pattern I experienced when I met you. And I think the challenging of explaining what is to work with the feminine energy is the best example of how challenging the feminine energy can be at the beginning, when you start working with it and you don’t have a reference. So maybe this is the best way to start, explain a little bit. What is it working with the family and energy?
Ioana
What does it mean? How it changes everything it’s about how we always say, Find your why. It’s very fashionable. Now, after the famous book find your why, and it’s extremely useful. But I think we should write a book. Find your how, figure out your house, or figure out your house.
Oana
Well, before explaining that, the way I see it and the way I guide it, I’m going to throw back the question to you and I’m going to ask you, how do you experience the feminine energy and this process now, after working with me, after experiencing it, you’re not just fascinated anymore. If you’re fascinated, you’re not just fascinated and unclear. So to the extent of I’m not fascinated anymore.
Ioana
But the amazement stays because this is the boldest characteristic. It always surprises you. It’s completely unpredictable. And your question was how I experience it and exactly how you understand it.
Oana
How do you understand it?
Ioana
No, I’m not trying to understand it. That this is the big shift. I’m not trying to understand it anymore. I’m simply allowing it. And I’m experiencing the thing I feel the most on a daily basis is the ups and downs, the peaks and the valleys. It’s still a work in progress. I’m still junior at managing these ups and downs, but I’m learning to be in the flow and not try to not understand it. To be more specific, am I having a very bad day? I’m not trying to understand why I have a very bad day. I’m simply allowing the bad day to be. And of course, I learned how to manage the bad day because it’s not like simply allowing you to be all over the place and scream at people just because. But it is about allowing yourself to be and to understand what makes you feel like that, but from the flow, not from the mind.
Oana
And tend to your needs in that crisis in a way that’s feminine and is related to the feminine principle.
Ioana
This is where I still have work to do because it’s still something I’m learning how to do probably at this moment in my life. The only way I can manage that is simply by allowing myself to rest because I experience tiredness. And instead of blaming myself because I feel tired, which I do, I try to rest. And that’s all. But basically, to answer your question, this is how I do it. This is how I leaving the family now. I’m not trying to understand it anymore. I’m simply allowing it to be able to manifest itself. And I have no clarity on it. I still have completely no clarity on it. The only feedback I have is the feedback from people. I mean, I see people changing their attitudes around me. And even if I don’t have clarity and even if I don’t understand what’s happening and how it works, the feedback is enough. Even the feedback is not very specific. Nobody comes and tells you, oh, my God, you’ve changed so much. You’re suddenly different and fascinating. No, but you just observe how people connect with the different people in your life with whom you didn’t connect in a healthy way, suddenly disappear and the pattern changes to something that is more suitable for your needs.
Ioana
For my needs and for our needs. This is how I experience it at this moment in my life. But I’m still doing baby steps.
Oana
Yes, sure. It’s a process. It takes whatever it takes for everybody. Well, the feminine journey is a journey. And one of the things we need to reclaim and remember, because we have it somewhere locked inside of us, is that we receive a birth coat. It’s the feminine code, and it’s embedded in our DNA as women. And it should be passed down from generation to generation to younger women. And this rite of passage and this activation somehow got under the table, under the carpet, and it became a secret that was present in ancient times and kind of lost over the decades. But we’re reclaiming that secret now, and it really means we have access to energy, that’s sexual, in, sensual and gluey in its texture. But it is actually the life force energy of Mother Earth, which is a feminine energy. And this energy is the spark that our bodies are made of and the energy that’s meeting our soul energy and frequency when we come into our body in this lifetime, in a lifetime as human beings, and we have it. And this is like the feminine principle, and it has particular values, and it works in a particular structure and pattern, and the mind is the representation, the definition of the masculine principle.
Oana
So these principles, in a mystical way at the beginning of creation, are coming together. They’re making love and they’re creating whatever they’re creating each moment. So both women and men have the feminine principles in their lives. But we’re not living in a culture where that principle is valued, seen for what it is, and appreciated and included in our day-to-day occurring in ancient times, when the feminine principle was present in society and its values were revered and respected, it was much more clear. And of course, women, such the men, right, are the embodiment of that feminine principle. What does that mean? It means that women are created and molded in a particular way, and that’s very different than the way men are molded and created. And the way women are created is connected to feeling. And that doesn’t mean only having emotions, chaotic emotions.
Ioana
Emotions.
Oana
Yeah, that’s a feeling that is much more than that. It is a sum of energy, vision, information, context, whatever you want to call it, an emotion, which is emotion, like energy. Emotion. Right. So actually feeling is the sum of the energy, you know, the intense energy we can experience at any given moment of time. So women are intense. And when they’re connected to their feminine side, they are irrational, they are multilayered and multidimensional. They are organic and move in flow in a fluid motion. They are surprising and mysterious and they are a paradox. And these are actually values of the feminine energy and the feminine principle. So what does that look like in our day-to-day life? Well, we have really, as women, lost that knowledge and lost that point of view. And we have lived and got educated in society, especially in the Western culture where the mind is the most important. So now we are from day one connected to logic, connected to well behaved, connected to structure, connected to linear thinking, connected to achieving, having, experiencing, being in control and forcing things, and being tense and focused and clear. And while those are very important values, the gift of the masculine and the gift of the mind, they are counterintuitive to what our body needs and our emotional needs.
Oana
And our inner rhythm, which is the body and the emotions and the sensations and the inner flow, the inner universe of our feminine side soul, if you want. So we are kind of educated against ourselves and it creates different results. One of the results is the disconnection from the feminine energy and the disconnection from our intuition. So that kind of ends up creating confusion and isolation from our nature. And it creates a lot of dysfunctions as we move forward in life as women. Because we don’t really have a harbor to go to. We don’t really have an inner home to go to when we are in need. And the home of the mind. While it’s very important to have and while it can give somebody context, structure, rationality, and in a way power, it’s not enough for women. And we need warmth, we need fire. We need the paradox. We need the mystery. We need to shout at the moon. And while that can feel and look irrational and crazy, it’s a way in which we regulate our inner rhythm. We regulate our energies, and we regulate our anger, which is the primitive life force of the feminine principle known as Shakti.
Oana
So when we do that, when we shout at the moon, we turn our anger into creativity. Because that’s just the boiling energy that just kind of like accumulated, accumulated, accumulated. And we do that and we feel that and we have an inner rhythm month by month through our menstrual cycle. So when we’re living life in the mind, we’re totally disconnected from our bodies. Our bodies go through this huge initiation, huge sacred knowledge, and huge energy patterns because of the menstrual cycle, because of the hormonal cycle. And we are just not tapping into that. And that creates some kind of psychosis in our psyche because when our attention goes to the opposite pole than where we should be feeling and experiencing life. When meeting the feminine, the first challenge is to let go of the mind. And you start trusting the feeling, trusting your attitude, looking at life from your body, from your sensations, from your emotions. And they may be, at the very beginning, the immature emotions of an adolescent or a young girl or a young woman trapped in whatever emotional age you’ve been trapped because that’s where you’re disconnected from the feminine and from trusting that voice and that energy inside of you.
Oana
But however, it’s like what you said at the beginning, it’s hard and challenging, but you have to let go and keep going and trusting the process because the process guides you. The feminine energy guides you. And at the beginning, you don’t know how to tend to your needs and self-care. From a feminine perspective, the only thing you can let go of is the mind who tells you to push more and you can relax into resting. It’s a huge step, right? It’s a huge step for you. It took you a lot to get here. The next level, of course, is about caressing your body, being soft with yourself, tuning in to the right spiritual music that just elevates your vibration, putting on a warm blanket, and really meditating and staying with your ebbs and flows because it informs you of something. It informs you of your process, where you need to look at your manifestation. And these are the values and the qualities of the feminine power. The feminine is very powerful, but it’s differently powerful from the masculine. That’s what we need to understand.
Ioana
I put it down on paper because you already said touched on many challenges. Probably I didn’t even notice, but I just picked them. And the force is one of them. Strength is one of them, but I want to go through all of that. But before that, it came to my mind. Another answer to the question you’ve asked me is, how do I experience the family? Now? Probably the second bold way to experience it is I don’t have the feeling of living in separation. I don’t feel so much separated from other women, from men, from nature, from everything that’s alive. Because separation is something we even the feminist speech so many times slide into a kind of separation, men versus women. But the true nature of femininity told me that it’s about inclusion. Yeah.
Oana
You feel intimately connected, which is not sexual, it’s not romantic. It’s not even spiritual. It’s just like intimacy connects humans, connecting humans with another human or humans with life. And that’s one of the milieus in which the feminine energy rises and brings its potency to your life.
Ioana
Yeah, exactly. Now going back to the challenges, what you did was that you highlighted the strength of the feminine energy. But I think most of us, even if we don’t necessarily work with the feminine, have those qualities embedded, like the capacity to have multilayered thinking. The anger, even the power, and the strength. These are qualities, but they are considered weaknesses, and that’s why they become challenges. Men consider women irrational. We consider women irrational. Even though the multi-layer thinking is considered to be a flaw in their daily life. The anger from all of them. Anger is the most prohibitive and the most huge taboo. Even power and strength are considered to be something disruptive and something that can be dismissive at the point. But probably most of the time this happened because we don’t know how to tap into them the right way.
Oana
Because we don’t understand them. But you have to take a leap of faith and jump into the unknown with the feminine energy. The feminine energy is really not going to give you explanations to secure you saying yes to the process. And that’s one of the big steps for people. They want to secure themselves. They want to feel safe while they take a leap of faith. The feminine energy, Shakti in its full magnetic power, just comes. It is mysterious, it is uncontrollable, and it asks you to surrender and it will inform you and change you deep inside. It doesn’t work on the surface. It goes very deep, very silently. And then it just gathers energy, gathers energy, and then there’s this huge Earth shakes into your life and into your inner psyche and into your inner personality structure because it will clear away everything that’s outdated. It’s theoretical and dead.
Ioana
Yes, but this is very challenging.
Oana
No, it’s not challenging. It’s terrifying. Challenge is a very small word at the beginning phase for how it actually feels to take the leap into the feminine.
Ioana
And why would somebody say yes to that reason?
Oana
For two reasons. Why women would say that is because they love the thrill. They authentically love the thrill. I’m sorry for excusing the language. It’s fucking awesome. And any woman who will ever be challenged to take the thrill, let go of her Ladiness or her childliness and just jump because it resonates with something deep in the core of who you are. And you’ll say yes to it because it’s living on the edge, on the edge, and it’s intense. And that’s what women need to feel imbalance. They need ecstasy to feel imbalance. And lucky enough for them, they’re embedded with that power. And the feminine energy is just going to bring it to you without the man’s input. The man is initiating ecstasy because of the woman. It’s not the other way around. That’s a misconception. It’s a myth. So women love it. And when they hear the call, it struck a chord inside their psyche, in their heart. And the woman, they’re like, okay, this is home. I’m going to go for it. So it’s freaking terrifying. Why men love it is because that’s the funny surprise nobody expected. Why men love it because when women take the call, they get enlivened, they get mysterious, and they get sex appeal and charisma.
Oana
They get sexual and magnetic and just men fall in love and they feel nurtured by the void, the deep mystery, the feminine nurtures them. And they feel that longing for fresh energy because men get exhausted by their own minds as well. That’s not just women’s problems. Men have the same problem. And unlucky for them. They do not have a well of water to cleanse their thirst. That comes from the woman. That’s the problem in our society. If women are not flowing with the waters of the feminine, men definitely don’t have that experience. So both men nor women don’t have the river of emotions, of the flow of life, of the fresh energy to circulate among them and to create babies and love and revolutions. That’s why it’s so critical for us women to start coming back home and really first take the waters of the feminine and really bathe in them and really take care of ourselves and of our lack of energy and our deposits that are lacking energy. But then as this energy grows into our body, into our energy, into our lifestyle, it will dance into the lives of the people around us.
Oana
Naturally, it will expand into our men, into our children, and into the people around us. So it just touches everybody. That’s why you are experiencing this difference in feedback because people are feeling it. They’re feeling the energy or cultivating. So they are saying yes to the energy without even understanding the energy because you are an embodiment, you are becoming a vessel. You are a channel. You are allowing yourself to define yourself in a feminine way. But you are becoming feminine.
Ioana
Yeah, exactly. They don’t define it, and neither do I mean, it’s not something that you suddenly decide to do in a different way or something that you completely change the way you dress or it’s not a decision-making process that you do day by day. It’s something that surprises you and you don’t even notice it. You just see the effect. But I would really like to break it down a bit more because what you say is poetry. But I know from my very own experience that at the beginning of the process, we need somebody to break it down for us to really give us how one, two, or three steps on how to take something that’s challenging and make it work. And, for example, anger. How can we take anger, which everybody feels even if we don’t allow ourselves to feel it, and make it a source of creativity, not get stuck in it?
Oana
You’re talking about the process now, and we’re moving from context to process. Yes. First of all, you need to understand that to start your feminine journey, you have to connect with your body literally, literally physically connect, like touching your body, the limitations of your physical body.
Ioana
Which I want to mention because I got tricked by that. It’s not enough to think that you’re coming back in your body, because at the beginning I was thinking, okay, and now I’m coming back in my body, but it was still a mental process, and I still do it now, but that’s fine because.
Oana
You know, now the difference. It’s actually touching with your hands, your body allowing your thoughts to drift away like waves in water or in an ocean, and moving your attention to your breath and feeling your breath, feeling the contraction and the expansion of your breath in your body and through different tools, breathing exercises, mantras, meditations, whether they’re Tao or Tantric or just feminine at the moment.
Ioana
Intuitive.
Oana
Intuitive, yeah. Connected to dance and the flow and the way the body wants to move. And any constriction that’s in the body just breathing with it and allowing that stuck energy and stuck emotion to surrender. And then it’s just preparation. And then they’re going into the actual activation of the feminine energy, which is happening. And the way we facilitate it is through breathing and through the tower and Tantric practices. It’s actually going down into your heart, which is a sacred space. It’s a sacred energy, and it’s through meditation. And then you’re going down into disconnection with the Earth energy, because the Earth energy is a feminine energy, and you’re breathing in that energy, and you’re allowing that energy to, through the breath, come into your body and clear the blockages, the restrictions, the tensions you have in your body and allow that energy to flow. So it opens your subtle energy channels, it opens your chakras, it activates and puts emotion, these energetic centers we have in our body. And then just emotions come up, energies come up, visions come up, senses come up, messages come up. And your body wants to move, and you allow it to move.
Oana
And you have then the anger coming up, and then you’re just allowing the anger to have a voice. And you’re dancing like a shaman shouting at the moon. And you want to take your clothes off and you’re nude, and you’re like, wild and very wild and very intense. And I described how the feminine energy just guides you through the process. And then you feel like this energy is moving in your throat Chakra, for example, and you feel like the constriction. And then the healing energy, something is really happening there for you. And then you feel like you want to cry, and then you cry and you connect with your inner girl who tells you that she’s an artist, and you haven’t really allowed that artistry in your life. And then you have this activation of your third eye and you see this amazing painting, and then you kind of like, go and paint, and there you go. You just shifted your anger into your creativity, and it happened through your body, and it happened through being guided by the feminine energy. And of course, that just doesn’t mean that your anger totally disappeared from your life or it doesn’t have any other messages or it’s not stuck.
Oana
Anger from your childhood that just needs a therapeutical inner child work, for example. That’s a feminine process of dealing with your anger.
Ioana
And the key is that it’s not destructive anymore, because anger can be destructive. Yeah.
Oana
You either put it out on people or you implode in yourself based on how reckless or lack of courage you have in your psyche or in your personality. But it’s the feminine way of mystically taking energy and alchemy it into something else. Actually, this is one of the ways in which the family works. It altogether vibrations. And that’s one thing. Another thing is it works with darkness. And it’s not afraid of darkness. It sees darkness as the milieu in which creation happens. And the third thing that I think is part of the mystery and part of why it’s so hard to put our minds around it is that it’s a paradox. So you’re creative and angry at the same time, and they both coexist, and it’s okay.
Ioana
Exactly. That was my next question, because this translates in daily life as being super irrational, and everybody pulls out on you. Oh, my God, you’re being irrational. And sometimes maybe we are if we don’t know how to channel the paradox.
Oana
If we don’t know how to work with it. But I don’t think you have to actually do this in front of a public arena.
Ioana
No, I was saying that generally, we can be very irrational. And this is like a cliche. Men always say about women that we are irrational. And sometimes maybe we are. So how can we channel the irrationality and turn it into a juicy paradox?
Oana
You don’t have to do anything about that. You just have to accept that when you’re working with the feminine energy, you’re in your right hemisphere. And that’s UN linear. It’s multi-dimensional. It’s not irrational. It’s outside rational.
Ioana
So next time when somebody says, oh, my dear, you are so irrational, I would say, no, I’m simply not linear.
Oana
Which is true. Which is true.
Ioana
Yeah.
Oana
And we have to start engaging with that as a valuable thing.
Ioana
Yeah, exactly. Because we assimilate. When somebody tells us we are irrational, we suddenly get small and shrink. Yeah, we shrink.
Oana
Exactly. We shrink to fit a particular set of standards and stereotypes that are embedded in the masculine society and are embedded in our society. But we’re moving away from that. And that’s why I think as equal as Wayfarer as equal pay, as equal as sexual abuse and all the other things we’re fighting for. We have to also fight. Well, it’s not a fight, but like using the brackets to fight for understanding the feminine values and the feminine principles and giving ourselves room for it. It cannot just be the Avenue of the artists and the crazy people and the Avenue of the weird women, which were witches and were burned on the stick. We have to move away from that cliche and stereotype the feminine heals in its mysterious way.
Ioana
In a general way. At the societal level, we are. But most of the time we come back home and feel guilty about what we should be proud of.
Oana
Well, yeah, but that’s the power of the sisterhood, and that’s the power of reaching down to other women who are taking the same journey and are slowly moving from feeling guilty to honoring the sacred and honoring the feminine and taking power from that and showing power because of that and being a way shower. When I moved from the Indonesian jungle where I really received this vision, and for those who don’t know me and know my journey, you can listen to episodes 26 and 27 because I really break it down there. When I had this vision I need it, and then it became a leadership mission, which was other women should also need it. And I could be the one who could, among other women, share this knowledge or share this vision or share even the self-marriage with this feminine energy. Right. When I came back from my Indonesian retreat to initiation jungle experience, I came back into a structure that was completely masculine. I had, like, I don’t know, three women, two of them who were my sister’s friends from the retreat and my spiritual mother. And that was it. And no man whatsoever was totally connected to me in a way that was respectful of my feminine energy.
Oana
That’s one of the reasons why I totally let go of that current relationship I was in and just ended because that guy was so rigid in his thinking and had so many issues around his rigidity that there was no way he would ever be flexible enough to just consider a conversation, let alone live with somebody who was activated and was living life through the feminine. But I had no reference for it and I had no structure of support and I had nobody would value it. Who cares? I had to be that I had to leave that for my own mental health, for my own soul health, for who I was. And I felt so powerful and so attractive and so charismatic that I just become it and own it and lived with it and lived by it. And slowly, slowly, slowly, everything shifted. And it just guided me into creating a huge community of women and men who are feeling it getting replenished by it, are seeing its value, and are allowing it into their lives. And I haven’t seen anybody who is in conflict with it. They are conflicted by it. They’re challenged by it, but they’re not in conflict with it because it’s life.
Oana
It gives life. It replenishes life. So it’s like being a wagehower is much more fun than feeling guilty.
Ioana
And by saying that, I think we have to move to our next episode, which is about breaking down the sisterhood and the sisterhood bond and the sacred circle of the feminine but just to wrap it up for me it’s clear the feminine is about the house and that’s all.
Oana
Yes. Thank you for this passionate talk. I get very passionate about it but I think it’s also important. So for those of you women who are men who are willing to take the leap of faith and start your feminine journey there.
Ioana
It will really benefit you and I would kindly ask our listeners because just to make a short before closing the episode when I was preparing for today’s podcast I tried to do a bit of research on Google. My Google is my friend and I really Googled challenges of women and there are threads on Cora talking about that but my God, it’s so far from anything related to true. I mean people really bit about the Bush a lot. I mean they’re like all over the place.
Oana
So please send us your real challenges of women with a lot of feminine and how you win those challenges because we need references and stories to tell to other women so that we can inspire each other.
Ioana
We need stories and the whole world needs stories because now if you search on Google and if you try to find other stories from a first shot, obviously you can find meaningful stories but you have really to dig deep for them so shout out and tell your story for the sake of humanity. Okay, I’m becoming dramatic. Very good for you. It’s okay.
Oana
You can be dramatic. Thank you very much for listening to us.
