Oana
Hello and welcome to a new episode of The Feminine Uncut podcast, episode number 19. So we’re on the move. Definitely. How can I feel pleasure? How do I open to intimacy? How can I let go and say yes to my full sensuality? What should I do to not feel pain anymore? How can I become open and close to my beloved? There are only some of the questions you’ve been sending us, ladies, and we’re here to support your growth, our growth, and the story of the feminine. These are, in fact, critical questions in the life of a woman, questions we all ask ourselves and challenges we all bump against. So we really want to dare to start engaging in those questions and actually engaging in the answers and go out of the darkness of not asking for help or not talking about it. Sensuality and female sexuality are very important to our authentic self, care, self-respect, and empowerment. And that’s why we’ve really decided to take all the time we need and pay attention to these topics. And on the platform The Feminine.com, you’re going to hear more about our not only answers and ideas, but also practices and exercises you can do to start, feel pleasure, spice up your life, become fully attractive, and really engage with this magnetic, mysterious power that the feminine energy can bring into our lives.
Oana
So we’re going to dive into the topic of pleasure today and try to make it more relatable and empowering, and you’ll see why this is super important. And I’m here with Joanna, as always, and she’s going to start the conversation by reading some of the questions we’ve been receiving from you regarding the topic of sensuality and female sexuality. But before we start, if you’re listening for the first time, I’m Juana, founder of The Feminine.com, an online platform dedicated to women all over the world. And our mission statement revolves around a totally new paradigm of self-care as a woman at The Feminine, we believe that once acknowledged and included in your daily life The Feminine principle, the Feminine energy, along with all its values, can totally transform the way we live, the way we live and the way we work. For the past 15 years, I’ve been a life coach entirely dedicating my last 80 years to working with women and empowering them to trust their voices and follow their hearts. The Feminine is actually the embodiment of my coaching method, and it brings together a lot of practices that are true and are tried with the intention to meet all the concerns.
Oana
The curiosities and the questions are very relatively important aspects of our womanhood, from sisterhood to sensuality to sexuality to love to intimacy, self-care, having your voice heard, leadership, relationships and dynamics between the feminine and the masculine, and everything in between. So jump to our platform, thefeminine.com dive deep into our feminine universe because we’ve got a lot of juicy stuff prepared for you with a lot of love and a lot of joy and a lot of care. Joanna, what do you have for us today?
Ioana
I have a very interesting story with many good questions. But first, I was wondering now listening to your intro, and I just realized that 90% of the questions we receive are related in a way to sexuality and sex. And I was just asking myself why we go so often to sex-related questions.
Oana
To sex-related questions. Well, I don’t know the universal truth or the universal answer about that, but I know that sex is very good. I’m sorry. I really laugh a lot, and I laugh high and loud. Sexy is really good, and pleasure is really good, and it’s easier to attain than love. So having those two sex and love being the highest in terms of pleasure and what makes us really feel good, I think sex is very important for us because in our culture, in our days, we want to feel good and we need to feel good. There’s so much stress going on in the world, in our lives that we need an outlet. And sex is a very good practice for that.
Ioana
Yeah, but there’s a lot of fine-tuning to be done there because actually many questions come from a level of I cannot feel enough or it doesn’t feel right, or what should I do to make it feel better? And just to make my point even more clear, we received a story from Joanne. She’s 28 years old. She sent us three pages of her story. I will try in a very Uncut way to go through her story because I’m not going to read it all. It’s very long. Long story short. She answered one of our emails where we asked our listeners, what do you need to feel pleasure? What do you need to open up to sexuality? And our question triggered her because she says that she’s been in a relationship, for 13 years old. She was 15 when she met her boyfriend. The first eight years were a very beautiful period. But in the past five years, a lot has been going through their lives and then kind of disconnected from one another. She met somebody else. They didn’t go very into much just had a story. Her boyfriend found out. And she doesn’t know exactly if that short adventure happened because she already felt disconnected from her boyfriend or the other way around.
Ioana
Her boyfriend disconnected because she found out about that story. But I will try exactly to give you some quotes from her story because she kind of goes exactly something that I think a lot of us encounter in our personal stories. She says that her boyfriend doesn’t really listen to her. And every time she tries to tell him what’s good for her and what feels right for her, he gives her the feedback, oh, my God, you just start again. You always criticize me you just have a problem. He keeps on telling her that she has a problem if she tells him what feels right for her. And she says everything I really want is to feel loved and to feel my body admired. But I really think it’s all the time interested only in penetration. I want to feel safe to be able to open up, but I can’t do that because I don’t feel listened to, looked in the eye, and supported. And she said something that I really think we need to use quite a lot because she really points out very specific about the dynamics between men and women. He needs sex to be able to be affectionate with me, but I need him to be affectionate with me to be able to have sex.
Ioana
And she basically asks how she can just make him understand what she needs or how she can open up to him so they can just speak the same language. And I think this is going to be more interesting if we just try to tap into the question of intimacy more than into the question of sexuality in this episode.
Oana
Both for both men and women are dynamic in a couple Well, I think they are both suffering from the adolescent syndrome. If they would come to me as a couple, that would be my assessment, which actually means that they’re both trapped psychologically, sexually and psychologically, and emotionally. That goes along with intimacy into that stage of adolescence where you have different desires or you’ve evolved as a human being both emotionally and sexually, but you are afraid to really step out of your comfort zone and really fulfill that rite of passage fully. You have the desire inside of you, but you haven’t really given yourself permission to go through whatever experiences you need to go through in a more grounded, more self-care type of experience in which you explore your sexuality and your intimacy to a whole new level and take the courage to either let go of that relationship or come back to it in a more grounded or more mature way. And it’s very painful, but in a way, for couples who have grown up together, that’s like a very big bumping landmark. And not only for couples who have grown up together, but also for couples who have stayed long in a relationship, there comes a time in the relationship when the hormones, the chemistry, the sex drive, the libido starts to fade away and you need to really develop new ways in which to find one another in order to communicate with one another.
Oana
And briefly, from that paragraph where you don’t are telling me I’m not feeling Matt and he’s not taking care of me by listening to me, by understanding my needs and my communication lands on his ears is criticized. That just tells me that both of them are not communicating first and foremost from a place of authenticity towards their own self, because authenticity would actually mean, these are my needs, these are my desires, and I’m giving you permission and freedom to not be able to meet me. But I need to take care of myself, and I need to own that. That’s what I need. That’s how I want to make love with a man, for example. So it’s up to you if you’re going to listen to that and step into that role and really shift this dynamic with me, or I’m giving myself permission to be met that way. That’s the way in which you can communicate in a way in which the universe can actually draw that experience closer to you. And it would start your right of passage into a much more mature sexuality and intimacy. And in that way, the man who is receiving this feedback would actually have the space to own the feedback or say no to the feedback.
Oana
Most of the time we don’t communicate that way because we take the other for granted in a relationship, especially if it’s a long-run relationship. He needs to meet me the way I need to be met. Well, we change so fast nowadays as human beings. What worked for me sexually one year ago will not work for me today. And unless I actually create a space first and foremost for my own exploration with myself and then a space of exploration with my partner and then give himself space to explore his own sexuality independent of me. And I don’t mean having sex with other women, just exploring his own process and really having space for each other and space for one another, then I’m not really growing in attunement with the relationship. And then it’s very easy to blame the other for not showing up. But basically, I’m not giving him a map either. So I could just be, in a way, trapped in the adolescent feeling, unseen, unloved being right that I matter, and he should make the effort. But fundamentally, he’s trapped in his adolescence, not knowing how to meet me in this new stage I’m developing, and most of the time if I would actually go to professional advice.
Oana
The first practice I encourage couples to do is to, first of all, disengage and start an independent journey without expectations from the other partner to meet.
Ioana
I was thinking exactly about this, not necessarily related to her question, but in general, because I keep on hearing stories, absolutely random of people who really bump into the same kind of blockage, either because they are not actually a very good match from the beginning or because they are in a very long relationship and things start to change and they don’t know how to address that. And one of the things I just keep on hearing more and more is that people are not available or are in a kind of way afraid to do exactly what you said. They don’t even think about the possibility of exploring on their own what they need and what their desire. I’m not sure if they just don’t want to do that or if they don’t know that’s an option.
Oana
No, I think most of the time we’re afraid that if we do that, we’re going to lose the relationship. And I think this is where Joanna, hello here, because you’re probably going to listen to us, and I want to not just address the dynamic of the couple, but actually empower you, Joanna, on the journey. This is where most of the time we stop in the fear that we’re going to lose something. Funny enough, whatever we fear, we’re going to lose. We have already lost you’ve lost who you have been for the last eight years in the relationship because you’re in a transition and you’re growing up to a new phase of your womanhood. So you’re losing who you have been until now and you’re losing that dynamic that gave you comfort and sex and passion and chemistry with your boyfriend. So that’s okay to let go of. And it’s also okay to say in the void and in the blackness of, oh, my God, what’s going to show up next? Even if that shows as a dysfunction for a period of time. And unless you actually lie to yourself and do not do the work, not authentically search who you are now becoming and giving yourself permission to birth yourself to a whole new level, then that is just a transition.
Ioana
I think many of us are many times scared of I just look in front of me and I see a huge ocean and I feel like I’m a small boat drifting. And how can I address that? That’s how life feels. And that’s how this type of transformation you’re speaking about, I think feels. I know it feels like this. Yeah.
Oana
Well, it’s the first moment of AHA, which actually includes you can’t have control, stop having control, or the need to control things. Life is bigger than you grow up and gets used to that lack of control because fundamentally you are a drop in the ocean and life is too big and you can’t really manage it and you don’t have the answers. And not knowing, I think, and being humble about not knowing is probably one of the biggest lessons an individual can open to. And these blockages, like my spiritual mother used to say when I showed up with my depression, my postpartum depression two months ago, thank you for the depression. I was like, Are you fucking kidding me? What do you mean thank you for the depression? It’s just like, yeah, but you’re so used to being so high-performance and controlling everything and managing everything, and you have all these tools that unless this depression would have really kicked you in the ass, you wouldn’t have been able to say, Change is happening to me. I need to look at it. And she was right. I hate it. But she was right. So it triggers like this.
Oana
It’s darkness at this type of level that is actually the inspiration for our growth. If we work with it, if we don’t work with it, the trouble is coming our way, but coming back to the couple. And what other people do is start authentically sharing. Not about the couple not arguing or not putting the blame on the other, but really talking about where I am and how I feel and where am I going. And if I don’t know, fine, I don’t know. It’s a lot of uncertainty. But this is actually the media that starts growing between two partners. And actually at the end of the road, helps the partners to become totally committed to the relationship.
Ioana
I just want to go a bit back because you pointed out something extremely important that I’ve been just thinking about it lately, which is desire. I think it’s a keyword. And I think desire can save us from a lot of trouble and feeling bored, and it can be such a huge inspiration in our lives. But the question is how we just tap into our desire because many of us don’t even know we have one. And it’s not exclusively related to sexuality.
Oana
Desire is something that I think is a very advanced question, and I want to take a step backward and talk about lust before I talk about desire, because desire is a very refined energy.
Ioana
It’s like life energy more than sexual energy.
Oana
They’re the same. Life force energy and sexual energy are the same. Actually, it doesn’t require sex. That’s the confusion. But desire is really me being alive in my own skin, in my own flesh, and being alive in my own life and really tapping through the senses with everything that life can give me, that feeling in my gut that, oh my God, I’m awake. It’s not just that life is happening through me. I’m happening through life at the same time. So desire is me knowing my passions. Desire is me being alive and craving with my whole heart itself, for life, for things in life, for my dream, for sex, for pleasure, for love, for intimacy, for chocolate, for good-hearted conversation with my best friend. Sunrise or sunset, whatever it comes after you are awake. But before you are awake, what triggers us and what overwhelms us, and what controls our life is lost, for me, the facilitator of human empowerment or woman empowerment is my sexual energy not being fully actualized, which means my life force energy, my sexual drive, my sexual energy not being met, not being known, not being released and circulated through my whole body.
Oana
So what happens is for us, women especially, and I’m going to address men have the same, but they have a different type of reaction to this that’s different than ours. I’m going to address women now for us women, especially in our 30s, we really tap into our huge creative life force energy, which is sexual magnetic energy. And it is not meant for us to overwhelm us and put us on a very difficult road of having too much sex or less sex or driving ourselves crazy around men issues. That happens to be the case. But that’s not the spiritual or the main intention of this life force energy. It’s actually us meeting the wild woman within and also tapping into our passions and our creativity and our true power. And we need to understand that energy is the catalyst for the process of knowing ourselves and owning who we truly are and owning the power that’s coming from our womb and our ovaries. Sex is just one of the languages, the many languages that women have to express themselves creatively. And that sexual energy. If I actually start owning it and how do I own it?
Oana
I breathe with it, I dance with it, I walk with it. I do different spiritual or sexual practices, but also I use them creatively. I use it in art. I use it in my psychic powers. I use it to evolve my intuition or to put life into a project or to love the whole world, not just my lover, and have sex, of course, yeah, it’s on the table. But if I really use it consciously, if I know it consciously, it’s actually a very profound opportunity, a window into who I really am or who I can become and what is my true potential as a woman. And I’ve seen it time and time again in my workshops where this huge reservoir of energy that’s trapped in my ovaries, trapped in my womb, that’s so not connected to sex, and it’s not even connected to a relationship with a man. That’s the tricky side. We get so obsessed that our womanhood is about men and our relationship with men because we got educated that way in our culture. But fundamentally, once you tap into this huge reservoir of energy that’s stuck in your robberies and your gut in your belly, what comes out is art.
Oana
What comes out is spiritual power. What comes out is your own capacity to gift life back, whatever gifts are true to who you are. And if I work with that energy and just don’t think I’m haunted by don’t let it haunt me, then I have a very profound understanding. Instead of answers to the question, who am I?
Ioana
What you say is true. And I’m just saying that because I can empathize with not all of them, but I’m sure many of our ladies listening to us, just listen to your words. They feel it, but they have this difficulty in imagining how to really put at work what you say. And I just want to come with a personal sharing, because I’ve been there. I know I’m repeating maybe some of these things, but I know that the power of example is, like, larger than life. And I know so well that when I met you, I was exactly at the point where I was so lifeless and so distant and away from anything related to my last desire. Those were strange words for me. I mean, I could understand them theoretically, but I couldn’t grasp them in practice. And I know resistance. I know that simply by being aware of that and by just listening to, for example, this podcast where we keep on talking about these things can change everything. Because once you become conscious of the possibility of passion, desire, and sexuality, things just started to shift. And I was so stuck in, Why can’t I have a relationship?
Ioana
Oh, my God. What’s wrong with men these days? Like the same story?
Oana
Yeah.
Ioana
I think every woman just goes through that narrative at least once in her life, and it was so tiring and boring and truly boring. I can see that now. And now I’m like, just I don’t know what happened in the meantime, but I seriously find myself at a point where I just don’t care about this. Like, I genuinely thought about it anymore, and it started to change and to shift. You have a saying. It’s like managing abundance, I think. I mean, that’s true.
Oana
It is.
Ioana
I mean, that’s true. And I would just love to give ourselves permission more just to stay in the process and release all expectations and just flow with what we feel, even if those are sad thoughts or emotions. How can we empower women more, just giving them more daily, small steps they can do just to stay in the process? And I don’t know how to even formulate the question.
Oana
Well, there are many exercises or things you can do. And as part of this podcast, we’re going to release some of the practices they can show up. And we have a lot of freebies coming up that are instructional exercises or practices one can do. But I have an answer that I think is an elevated answer to this topic because there are two extremes of the same dynamic. One is exploring your sexuality with more men, and one is going absent or being faithful monogamous. And why am I saying that is because I think we need to know who we are in our own sexuality to really feel fulfilled. But it’s not about having sex with a lot of men or how many positions you like or how you like it or whatever around.
Ioana
Which is in trending now.
Oana
This kind of approach for us women to really take it to the next level. That means knowing ourselves from a place of self-care and self-respect. And owning our sexuality means drawing a very clear path for our lovers or lovers into how they should meet us. And coming back to Joanne, I think what’s deeply missing and what should be the first place for her to look into in her womanhood is deeply understanding who she is to a place where she can map the territory of her own body, map the territory of her own sexuality with her partner, actual partner or future partner, whatever will show up as part of our process from a place of, hey, this is me as a woman, radiant, beautiful, sexual. If you want to meet me in my sexuality and my magnetism, this is the path, this is the road, and this is how we can really flow together. And this is not advice. This is me walking my talk in regard to my own sexuality. And I think if you go inside of you in that place where you truly authentically, let go of the shame, let go of the guilt, let go of the fear of being not known and the rigidity or frigidity there are blockages that come along on the path of our sexuality or sensuality and really understand your body and who you are from a place of love for yourself.
Oana
Then all this friction on the outside, in the dynamic with the men will start to melt, and men will show up in your place, in your space from, oh, my God, I’m attracted and I want to meet her. And I’m willing to be open about it. I’m willing to listen to the map she’s giving me. But you need to have a map for that man. You need to guide that man into your own fulfillment. And that’s one thing. And I think how you can achieve that by creating sacredness around this area of your life.
Ioana
That’s exactly her question, Joanne’s question because she ends her story saying, what do I really need to start exploring in a healthy way my sexuality and my sexuality? I think I would need to find out who I am. I think I would need to be able, to be honest with myself, give myself permission to explore more my intimacy and try not to listen so much at what people say. But she doesn’t really know how to do that. She would love to do that, but she doesn’t know where to start.
Oana
Well, start with accessing our sacred space, and meditation, really, I’m not joking. It can sound commercial, but it really, truly is without the commerce inside of it or beyond it. It truly is a first step, a very practical step. Why? Because you need to understand sacredness. Why is that important for a woman? Because I think this is the highest octave a woman needs as a space to experience her own sexuality and her own intimacy from a place of healing and deep love. Because unless she’s met in her spirit, she won’t feel whole. Unless you do your own journey of this self-discovery in a relationship or including or attuning to your higher spirit or your spiritual self, you won’t fully meet yourself as a woman, sexually or romantically, and you won’t be able to fully feel whole with a man. We think that it’s the men’s role to make us feel whole. No, he’s a trigger, as we are a trigger for him. He’s a catalyst as well as we are a catalyst for him. It’s a dance. But my wholeness my experience of feeling safe, and my experience of fully surrendering comes from meeting myself and my sexuality in a spiritual way, which means including my spirit in the experience of my sexual body.
Oana
Because sexual energy is coming from the Earth energy, it’s meeting me in my physical body, but it’s also bridging my physical body with my spiritual body. Only then is sexuality felt healthy, whole, and fulfilling. That’s why when we fall in love and we have such deep chemistry, it feels like, oh my God, I’m on drugs. What’s there? It’s a window where the souls are meeting, even if they’re wounded souls or they have dysfunctions. And it’s a fucked up story. In the end, it doesn’t matter or it can be a happy story. In the end, what happens is those individuals are meeting themselves in their spiritual self instinctually, instinctively unknowingly. And that’s where I feel so drawn to that person. There’s a piece of my soul reaching the other person and there’s a peace meeting me. So we need to understand that as women and in that pace of sacredness or coming from that context of sacredness, I can have sex with as many men. I desire and own my sexuality. Or I can be monogamous or I can be faithful or absent not having sex. And either way is just inner rhythms and stages of my own development as a woman and my own process of alive process of my own sexuality.
Ioana
So basically you’re saying that simply being aware and choosing from a place of awareness and being conscious really makes a huge difference.
Oana
Yes.
Ioana
You previously started to speak more about the difference between lust and desire. Can you please go back and just tell us something a bit more about that?
Oana
Do you have a more specific question or just to make it more clear.
Ioana
To make it more clear? Because what’s important and what I noticed from my own experience is that we often overweight lust and desire and hang on to men to feel alive. And I felt that you are exactly going to tap exactly into this distinction and point out exactly why it’s important to make desire your own and not connected, connecting necessarily with men or need to have a man in your life.
Oana
Well, you have lost your life the moment you are actually dead inside and you need coffee to get up in the morning and everything is truly not alive inside of you. So what shows up as lost is your sexual energy or your sexual drive was not fully met or not fully discharged. And you’re like hot on hormones and you just need to discharge. And this is in a way, last is the lowest frequency of sexual energy.
Ioana
Last is the lowest. Okay.
Oana
That one can experience so it’s like all your sexual energy is meeting you in your first Chakra in your womb, and it’s not fully circulated. It’s not met healthy in a healthy way. It’s not fully discharged. So it just brings a lot of stuckness and stickiness and it’s tension.
Ioana
You just really like tension.
Oana
Yes. So you release it and you release it in a 20 minutes sex episode, which is not fulfilling. And it doesn’t really meet you as a whole. You can’t really be met, especially as a woman, in 20 minutes. It’s impossible. And once men will get that women will demand the other version, which is like a whole night of lovemaking.
Ioana
I don’t want to interrupt you, but I really think that the difference would be.
Oana
To be honest, no, that.
Ioana
Says men are more available to hearing that than are we meant to actually demand it or say it because if you tell them, I swear to God, I had a random conversation with my friends telling them this, and they were like, oh, my God, really? I didn’t know that. But they genuinely didn’t know that because nobody told them. And I just told them, just trust me, if you can’t reach, like, the climate in 20 minutes.
Oana
Yeah, well, both women and men, I think, have to let go of the label that orgasm or doing a very good, I don’t know, set of movements in sex. It’s like an objective of the sexual encounter. We’re heading towards desire, which is actually feeling alive when a woman and a man met, neither men nor women meet in the sacredness of their sexuality or their intimacy. They don’t have the objective of women coming to orgasm or men coming to orgasm. They have the objective of playing and dancing with one another. So what does it mean to have sex for the whole night? It doesn’t mean you’re actually having sex the whole night. It literally means you’re going into this space of prelude, which doesn’t require an orgasm. And you’re playing and dancing and being intimate with one another and really taking little things, bringing them to your attention and making them big things, like hugging and really kissing and then taking a break and drinking something really good and then putting on some music and really allowing the sound to activate and relax you. And then these are, in a way, very scientific because it’s moving you from the left hemisphere to the right hemisphere, and they’re bringing you into a much more open, relaxed way of being, which is intimate.
Oana
And what does happen to her when it relaxes her? She can flow with her emotions. And most of the time when a man is really open to his emotions and her emotions, then that just opens a woman to her own emotions as well. And it gives her permission to open her sex center for me.
Ioana
Exactly the opposite of what you’re saying, which is 101% true. It’s like being asked, was it good? Did you orgasm? I mean, the day people won’t ask each other this question anymore, I think it’s going to be a revolution.
Oana
These are the most boring and turning off questions from the entire University because it’s a competitive way of looking at something that gets activated fully. Exactly the opposite. When you don’t have any competition when you can have no expectations when you understand that sexual energy comes in peaks and valleys. So you have a very intense state of pleasure, and then you have a pause, you have an intense state of pleasure, and then you have a pause. And that’s a very important thing because that happens in a sexual relationship and in the dynamic between a couple. They have moments when they are sexually drawn to one another and they have breaks. And if you honor both of these faces, then you dive deeper into a more profound sexuality that will last longer in the dynamic of the couple. And that’s one thing, a very important thing. And the second very important thing, I think, is to understand that we are opening ourselves to sex differently as men and women. Men actually open to their first Chakra, their penis, and their whole womb area. And that’s why they need to have sex very quickly because they’re already open.
Oana
And this is what charges and electrifies the energetic system of the woman. So if the woman would actually receive his energy and know how to dance with that energy, she would actually open herself to her emotions. And those emotions will reach the man’s heart. So it’s like from the womb area of the man, the sexual energy flows to the heart of the woman. Then from the heart of the woman, it flows to the heart of the man and from the heart of the man back to his woman. So it’s a very interesting circuit. But the man has to understand that for that flow to happen, he needs to open the woman emotionally. And for her to be open emotionally, requires emotional availability. And it requires romance. It requires relaxation, massage, no expectations, no drive, no pressure, and all the things that are there for a man.
Ioana
I think we can navigate this topic so much more from now, but we’re approaching the end of this podcast. And we have another question we got from our Darling Charlotte Lot. It’s not necessarily related to sexuality or sexuality, but it’s related to relationships and couples. And after she graduated from our Sensuality Master class, I think she’s one of the top examples of what Sensuality Master class can do for you. And you can put yourself on the wish list to be the first to find out more when we open a new enrollment. After graduating Sensuality Masterclass, she met a man, and it was very different.
Oana
Yes, that happens.
Ioana
Yes, it really does. And she was very different from anything she experienced before that happens. Too, she noticed the difference and she actually asked us if they are connected because it was too much of a coincidence. And you answered her and said yes, that happened. And now she has a curiosity she asked us about she feels I don’t have the question, but I have it in my mind and I will just try to narrow it. She finds it a bit difficult to stay feminine when she’s not in a feminine environment. And she gives the example, I feel a lot more feminine at my place where it’s my home and I have everything decorated in a very familiar way. But then when I’m at his place with his roommate and she doesn’t feel the same and she asked us if this is normal or how she can fix it if there was anything to fix.
Oana
Well, first of all, it’s really on an energetic level for her to understand a couple of things. One is that she needs to keep doing the practice so that she can connect with her feminine energy in a more secure, more grounded way and in a more stable way so she doesn’t feel influenced by the outside that much. And that comes through practice. A very important pillar on that journey is staying in the sacred circle of the women who are also practicing conscious femininity because this is where on an energetic level, we draw resources from the moment we need them. It’s like she’s going on his territory with his male friends. She needs female friends energetically to counterbalance that male energy in the space. That’s why she feels daunted by it because she needs to have her own amount, volume with bracket volume of feminine energy to meet his male energy. And in that way, balance will happen. So that’s one of the reasons why she feels like it’s daunting. So it’s about drawing the energy, the feminine energy of the circle to support her in this process of balancing the feminine and the masculine in the space, the physical space of her beloved.
Oana
And the third thing that would really be important is actually creating a happening where she’s bringing her feminine energy and her feminine gifts and even decorating something or bringing something feminine to the space of her beloved. And it’s not about moving into his place, but really say, let me entertain you, let me give you a feminine encounter this evening. And she can, for the space of that event, decorate or bring feminine things that anchor her own feminine energy. I don’t prepare a dance for him, make a beautiful prelude. That’s just part of her feminine gifts. And just men are insane and in love with this. They just love it and they will just become addicted to it and they will say more and more.
Ioana
I promise you, just stop because I know we are like running out of time, but this is super important because you just tapped into something I noticed and it’s important to explain a bit more this will help shut down a lot also because there are two dynamics. What I notice from what men tell us in a very friendly way, I have a story from a common friend of ours who just had a relationship with a beautiful girl who was actually in love with her. He liked her a lot because she shared that with me. And one day we were working together and he came. He was yellow-colored and she said, miss, I have a problem. You know, my girlfriend, came yesterday and everything was absolutely amazing. But in the morning when I woke up And I saw her toothbrush in my bottom, I just had a panic attack and he was a bit exaggerated because we know him. He’s a bit exaggerated. But I noticed that there’s a difference between just coming and just moving your toothbrush after two days of being together and doing what you were saying.
Oana
Yeah, so I’m not saying or recommending putting the toothbrush into his bathroom Because this is a step into the relationship that he needs to invite you into or you need to both agree about it. I’m talking about a feminine delight evening Where you’re bringing your feminine Arsenal to enchant your man, which is actually a sacred practice that has been a bit advanced also and also yeah, a little bit advanced Because you have to really know your gifts as a woman and be free to express it with your man from a very sensual place or seductive place. So you have to own your sensuality before that. And for those who want to join that level of sensual power, Stay tuned and put yourself on the wish list because our sensuality masterclass does that.
Ioana
Yeah, it really does. And shut a lot said it. I think we have to end this podcast and shut a lot. I hope Oana’s answer was okay with you. Give us your feedback and just send us your questions because they’re really good.
Oana
And also, Ioana the same keep giving us feedback about the things we have explored And I think we’re going to address a very important topic that is part of Ioana’s story, which is monogamy, polygamy, cheating, faithfulness, healthy exploration, all of these things where it’s not going to be in the next podcast. So stay tuned if you really want to dive more into those ways in which we are exploring our sexuality and know who we are.
Ioana
Thank you because our next episode is very different. It’s very Uncut.
Oana
Yes, it is. Bye, everybody.
